With Fresh Coconut Milk
Days Walking - 61
Wow Kato! I didn’t know you took requests -
Dropping $5 in Kato’s tip jar - your lyrics kick ass as per usual!!
You’re spoiling us terribly, you know that.
The Prudhoe oil spill wasn't as bad as they thought at first, that's cool. You there, in the back, with the yawning - Am I boring you with my Adoration of the Environment? Huh? Beat it, you.
My iPod crapped out after like 30 minutes this morning. Looks like I picked the wrong day to run out of caffeine. Slogging along listening to the wind, trucks go by, and my companions blathering was damned grating. Just about every item we have with a battery in it is getting really wonky lately. Still haven’t found the backup battery for the satellite system.
Since I took the last of my caffeine this morning, from now on you can expect boring, low-energy posts. Just give up on me immediately and go surf some porn. Go on, enjoy.
I have a headache. This may be caffeine withdrawal talking, but I’m sick and tired of wind, snow, hiking, and Gabe’s annoying laugh. Damn dude, it’s not that funny.
Also, caffeine.
I just want a warm bed to curl up in, and some hot potato cheese soup from Claim Jumpers - the kind that comes in the scooped-out sourdough bread bowl that you can devour when the soup is gone. And a hot fudge brownie with gourmet vanilla bean iced cream on top. And a tall Cherry Coke - the good kind, with grenadine.
And to curl up in my tattered flannel blankie and Space Channel 5 slippers on the floor in front of the TV and watch all the episodes of Desperate Housewives that I’ve missed.
And go to the mall and people-watch and sight-see all the lovely boys.
And I want to find some quality companionship and have a lucid conversation with someone that does not involve arctic survival, life and death seriousness and pooping in f*cking tents. All the people in my group are assh*les. Yes you heard me Gabe YOU’RE ALL ASSH*LES!
You know those questionnaires where they ask “If you were marooned on a desert island, and you could only have one companion, who would it be?”
Here’s my advice: Pick someone you could easily beat in a fight. Let them help you build the shelter and dig the well, then smother them with a pillow and eat them. People suck, you’ll be happier living alone.
And their bones can be fashioned into useful tools.
Litany Webb, signing off
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posted by Litany @ 9:14 AM
3 comments
3 Comments:
I dunno, in spite of the lack of caffeine, your post had me laughing. Maybe the headache boring its way through your brain is helping you tap into your inner blogging abilities.
I found your advice to be quite amusing. I had never thought of picking a desert island cohabitant that I could use for both food and shelter. Of course at this point the only person I could beat up would probably be a 12 year old girl, and it would be a close match.
Thank you for the $5. I should probably share some of it with Robin, since she prompted the whole thing. Um, here's a dollar, go buy yourself something pretty. I'll be performing next at the Luxor in Las Vegas, right before Blue Man Group.
Litany...my darling...let it all out...speeeewww it out....caatharrrsis...feeeeels goooood.
I would have snapped on day 12. Snow sucks. Wind sucks. Sleeping in the snow sucks as would shitting in a tent. Sucks Sucks Sucks
Can I send you caffine? I am serious. Give me a P.O box. Its my duty to help all the caffine addicted in this world...
and for what its worth...I havent been keeping up with Desperate Housewives these days...but I do know a juicy tid bit...want some spoilage???
This just in from the "Attempts to Cheer People Up Gone Horribly Wrong" department: Real world ain't that much better. Only more assholes. Face it, you only have to deal with a handful.
Hermitism rules.
A slightly bad day here too. I ran out of cigarettes.
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